haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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