so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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