Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
