big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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