come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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