NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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