i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize