so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
