That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
