Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
