Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
