I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
