I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
