I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
