my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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