And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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