the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
