It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Randomize