ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
