I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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