I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Randomize
