people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Randomize
