The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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