I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I think your dad took our porno
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Randomize
