Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
