She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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