Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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