Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
