check it out our google latitudes are spooning
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
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