Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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