Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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