i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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