Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
