Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
