We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
