My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
Randomize
