Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
