Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
