WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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