If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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