also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
i think i just lost a toe
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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