it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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