Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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