I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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