i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
