I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Randomize
