so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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