I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
