Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Randomize
