Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Randomize
